How to Do a Cord Cutting Ritual After a Breakup (2024)

Breakups are always painful, even if you know your relationship is coming to an end. It’s difficult to let go of someone and feel the void they once reserved in your life. 

As much as you want to move on, unfortunately, healing doesn’t always happen after a pizza night at home or time with your friends. However, many people find comfort in doing a cord cutting ritual for that much-needed closure before moving forward in life.

Check out this cord cutting ritual interpretation, as well as how you can perform it when breaking up with your lover or a friend.

What Is a Cord Cutting Ritual?

This performance allows you to cut ties with a person, place, relationship or even a state of mind that no longer brings value to your life. While it’s commonly used to get over a breakup, it can also be done to end toxic relationships with toxic friends, jobs and even insecurities.

The cord cutting ritual interpretation is straightforward. It allows you to break free from someone or something that has become a part of your life. The cord cutting ritual provides a process wherein you visualize the cord that tethers you to the one you want to disconnect from and then sever it. 

You’ll only need a couple of tools, such as a cord and a pair of scissors. Others only rely on visualization. Whatever your process, this ritual will allow you to heal your heart and live fully in the present.

How Can It Help?

One of the main goals of this performance is to release yourself from negative energy that may be coming from unhealthy energetic ties. It reduces anxiety that may stem from the past and frees you from lingering feelings.

You’ll also feel more empowered and may even start saying daily affirmations that may become your new source of strength. More importantly, it accelerates your healing process so you can enjoy life to the fullest.

You don’t have to understand the ins and outs of cord cutting fully. The ritual is open for those who just broke up with someone, whether a lover or a friend, or want to eliminate negative emotions and restart their lives.

Before committing to starting this ritual, you must become intentional about severing your energy from this individual. Depending on the intensity and length of your relationship, your energies may be stronger than you’ve thought. 

What Are Cord Cutting Candles?

In a cord cutting ceremony, two candles are tied together, either connected by the wicks or with string. Some people recommend using black candles, but you can choose whatever color resonates with you.

Using candles simply provides something to focus on while performing the cutting ties ritual. Candles are often used during rituals and meditation as a focal point to keep your mind from wandering.

Cord Cutting Ritual After a Breakup

Cutting ties with candles can be especially beneficial after ending a toxic relationship. The emotional impact of tumultuous relationships can linger long after the breakup. Many people seek a spiritual release from those emotions.

If you have just left a toxic relationship, a cord cutting ceremony can give you closure and peace.

Cord Cutting Ritual for a Friend

This exercise is not exclusive to romantic relationships. If you struggle with a toxic bond with a friend, you can perform the cord-cutting ceremony to release your energetic attachments. Friendships end for many reasons, such as dishonesty, disrespect, manipulation or distrust. Even if the relationship ended amicably, you can still perform a cord cutting ritual for your friend to aid your healing.

Required Supplies

Prepare the following items once you’re ready to perform a cord cutting ceremony:

• Candles: These provide something to focus on while performing the cutting ties ritual. In a cord cutting ceremony, two candles are tied together, connected by the wicks or string. 
• Thread: A visual representation of your bond with someone.
• Scissors: This tool is needed to cut the energetic attachments. 
• Bowls: You’ll need two for the ritual.
• Sea salt: This is used to hold your candles.
• Herb: Plants and woods for cord cutting are also essential to strengthen the effect of ritual, whether doing the cord cutting ritual for a friend or a past lover.

Other herbs for cord cutting ritual and their properties include the following: 

• Lavender: Healing, protection and peace
• Rue: Protection and positivity
• Cloves: Spiritual healing and cleansing
• Mugwort: Safety and increased divination
• Sandalwood: Healing, safety and positive energy
• Wormwood: Peace and inhibition of violent acts — this herb is ideal for a cord cutting ritual if you’re coming from a traumatic past

How to Do a Cord Cutting Ritual

Now that you understand the cord cutting ritual, implement these steps whenever you can break free from the painful past.

Set a Sacred Space

Smudging is a standard practice to cleanse your room filled with negative energy. Gather sage or other herbs used for cord cutting ritual into a bowl or other vessel and find a fanning tool, like a folded piece of paper. Open a window and then find something to create your spark.

Use a lighter or match to set the stick alight then burn it for around 20 seconds. It should create enough smoke so you can quickly fan it into the corners of your room. Healers believe that sage solves most spiritual dilemmas like negative energy or heavy spirits, so safely smudge your ritual space and douse the sage in water when you finish.

Prepare the Candle and Bowls

Next, get two small candles, 10 inches of twine and two small bowls with enough sea salt to hold your candles in place. Twist the corded twine into three loops, laying each loop around the candles in your salt bowls. Light the candles and settle your mind.

Focus Your Energy

The most important part of a cord cutting ritual is focusing your energy. Some people use ashwagandha powder to relieve their depression symptoms and help them hone their emotional state. Others take deep breaths or wear sound-blocking headphones if their surroundings are noisy.

After lighting your candles, use your preferred focus method to center yourself. Hold a picture of your ex to attune yourself to their energy. Thank them for the lessons you have learned and will learn from their presence in your life. Tell the universe that you want to release their energy from your heart.

Burn the Person’s Picture

As you say this mantra, carefully put a corner of the photo into the candle’s flame. Lay it onto a plate or bowl when the fire gets too close to your fingers. You’ll remove any lingering energy from their presence as the picture turns to ash.

One of the final steps is burning the twine. Use the same lighter or another match to light it from each end. It will burn into the middle of the cord and, as it does, say that you’re releasing any ties that bind the two of you together. Remind the universe that you are claiming the peace that’s rightfully yours. The twine should burn completely by the time your mantras are over.

Release the Leftover Salt and Ash

Gather any lingering ash into your bowls of salt. Ideally, you would let go of the mixture into a natural water source, such as a pond. If inaccessible, you can use the sink or a toilet. Washing it all away will close your space and end the cord cutting ritual for your friend or lover, but you can also finish with a mantra about releasing your past if you want to speak to the universe once more.

What You Should Do After a Ritual

Check in with yourself after finishing your ritual. See if your anxiety, heartache or depression feel less like a looming shadow over your heart. You should feel more peace and room to breathe.Reflect on the relationship because you’re in a better place. If you’re seeing a potential new lover or meeting a new friend, you can use a birth chart compatibility. These readings help see if your charts match based on romantic or platonic compatibility. Many people seek others that pair well astrologically with their star sign, which could help you find your next partner when you’re ready to love again.

Try a Cord Cutting Ritual Today

Now that you know how to do a cord cutting ritual after a breakup, try it today to see if it helps. You can always repeat it whenever negativity comes back into your life so your post-breakup journey fosters more peace and better self-growth.

Original Publish Date May 28, 2021 — Updated 1/25/2024