How to Build Self-Esteem and Not Care What Others Think

Having high self-esteem is the best way to understand your worth. Still, not everyone has the self-esteem that they should. Low self-esteem can begin as a result of stress or due to messages received in childhood. Unfortunately, society promotes a certain beauty standard that not everyone can attain. The best you can do is learn how to build self-esteem and love yourself for who you are, not try to change for a trend — and these tips can teach you some ways to have confidence in who you are.

1. Challenge Negative Thoughts

Negative thoughts can be the bane of anyone’s existence, especially if you have them about yourself constantly. Try reframing negative thoughts to positive ones by thinking of the bright side in every situation. If everything feels like it’s going wrong, focus on the things that could go right. It might be easier said than done, but this tip will benefit you the most in your journey to learn how to build self-esteem.

2. Recognize Your Triggers

Does something make you start feeling bad about yourself? Examine the situation you’re in when you begin to have demeaning thoughts about yourself. If they start to creep up when you’re around certain people, consider taking a step back from those relationships. Once you know what triggers those self-deprecating thoughts, you’ll learn how to deal with them.

3. Practice Affirmations

Affirmations are the best way to “fake it ’til you make it.” They can help you believe positive things about yourself, even if you don’t believe them right away. The right positive affirmations can help you start loving yourself intentionally and show you the power you have within yourself. Use the power of your mind to your advantage when attempting to build your self-esteem.

4. Support Positive Relationships

Put more into your positive relationships than the ones you get nothing from. When you put everything into a relationship without receiving anything back, you can start to feel burnt out and worthless. You need to support the relationships that make you feel good about yourself, as they’re the people who really want to see you grow and improve.

5. Make Small Changes

If you’re truly unhappy with your life, try making small changes to see what you can improve. Consider trying a new skincare routine if you are self-conscious of your face, or you can go to a gym if you want more muscle definition. Learning how to build self-esteem might include changing things up, as just a tiny difference can make you feel better about yourself. 

6. Say “No” More Often

Part of your low self-esteem may stem from wanting to keep everyone happy. A lot of people-pleasers have a fear of rejection and might have low self-esteem as a result. Though it might be hard, learning to say “no” is one of the best things you can do for yourself to preserve your peace. Practice saying no to little things before working up to bigger ones. Prioritize what you love and want to do above all else.

7. Take a Break

Sometimes, you need to take a step away from everything. When you’re under severe stress, you might find that your self-esteem is lower than ever. Learning how to build self-esteem entails learning how to walk away from something that doesn’t serve you. Whether it’s responsibilities at work or a relationship that’s causing problems, choosing to take a break can give you the stress relief you need to regain confidence in yourself.

Learn How to Build Self-Esteem Effectively

People know how to build self-esteem in different ways. What works for someone else might not work well for you. Since everyone is different, it only makes sense to try different methods of building your self-esteem until you find something that sticks. Once you understand your worth and surround yourself with people and things that support you and the life you want to create, it’ll be difficult for anyone to take that away from you.