Funny Wedding Vows for 2023

Do you and your partner want to add some humor to your big day? Or, do you want to surprise your partner with some laughter on an otherwise very serious yet delightful occasion? You’ll never forget your wedding day. Have some funny wedding vows prepared so that no one in attendance forgets your vow exchange. 

I Do

Whether you and your partner have decided to write your vows or use ones you find, a little inspiration can go a long way. Writing wedding vows can be intimidating. You’re supposed to share your feelings with the love of your life and the rest of the guests simultaneously. How intimate and, if we’re being honest, a little scary.

Showing off your humor with some witty vows that make your partner and everyone else laugh with you is the way to go this year. You can still be sweet and sentimental while showcasing your inner comedian. It is your wedding, after all.

Think about how a hilarious or whimisal theme might add another layer to your funny wedding vows, such as a circus or masked ball that plays on themes of mystique and clever humor.

Get Inspired

Look up funny wedding vows on the internet. Use some flashcards for inspiration or a wedding worksheet for vows to generate some ideas. Here are some one-liner examples of funny wedding vows that might spark a little inspiration for your wedding. 

One-Liners

• “I promise not to drink your drinks, even though I am thirsty and your drink is literally right there.”

• “I vow never to steal your covers unless you are hogging them.”

• “I vow to protect you from spiders as long as we both shall live.”

• “I promise to unclog the tub even though only one of us has long hair.”

• “I promise not to watch the next episode without you.”

• “I promise to be your co-pilot, your navigator, and to bring snacks on our road trip through life.”

Be Your Goofy Self

At the risk of sounding cheesy, ensure you’re being true to yourself. You could find some vows that you think are hilarious, yet they don’t pertain to you. Make sure you personalize your vows to your unique personality and relationship. With a bit of tweaking, these vows could be the perfect fit for your big day. 

“I want us to grow old and crusty together, to shake our collective fists at teenagers, and to talk endlessly about the old days when things were better, cheaper, and generally more wholesome.” 

“As the wise Salt N Peppa said, what a man, what a man, what a mighty, mighty good man.”

“You are the most awesome person I have ever known in my entire life. I vow to protect you from danger. And I don’t care if I have to fight an ultimate fighter, or a bear, or him (points to a random guest) or your mom. I would take them down. I’m getting mad right now, even telling you. I wanna spend the rest of my life, every minute, with you, and I am the luckiest man in the galaxy.”- Parks and Recreation (television show)

Remember Who You’re Talking To

Use discretion when speaking about your partner’s pet peeves. You want to be humorous but also not offensive on your wedding day. Ensure that your partner will think the vows are funny as well. You’re not trying to impress anyone else.

Remember that there are people in the crowd, too, though. You don’t want to tell an inside joke in your vows that only you and your partner will understand. There will be an awkward silence from your guests (crickets chirping) when you expect some laughs.