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Weddings are full of long-standing traditions, some that have stood the test of time and some that are fading out. The garter toss is one of the more controversial customs that many couples are choosing to skip. But what exactly is the wedding garter tradition?
Learn more about the history of the garter toss and the pros and cons of including it in your reception.
What Is the Wedding Garter Tradition?
A wedding garter is an elastic band of fabric that a bride wears around her thigh. Traditionally, they used to hold up stockings for everyday wear. Now, garters are considered part of bridal lingerie. Mothers of the bride sometimes turn parts of their wedding dresses into garters for their daughters, while grandmas might pass down the ones they wore.
Wearing a garter under your gown is not the only part of the tradition, however.
During the reception, guests gather around the bride as she sits in a lone chair. Her new spouse kneels before her and tries to remove the garter from her leg, sometimes with his teeth.
The groom then tosses the garter into the crowd of single men to try to catch it, as the male equivalent of the bouquet toss. In some cases, the man who caught the bouquet is then expected to put the garter on the leg of the woman who caught the bride’s bouquet.
What Does the Garter Toss Mean?
Similar to the bouquet toss, some say the garter toss is meant to share good luck with eligible bachelors in the room. Whoever catches the garter is said to be next in line to get married.
There is an unproven theory that the practice dates back to medieval times, when people believed it was good luck to have a piece of the bride’s wedding dress. Brides started tossing their garters to prevent people from trying to rip off pieces of their gowns.
While there is no definitive origin story of the tradition, it is generally considered a symbol of good luck and love.
Is the Garter Toss Inappropriate?
For many modern couples, the answer is yes.
I personally have witnessed a garter toss that made everyone in the room incredibly uncomfortable. It was mildly awkward to watch the groom get on his hands and knees and go up the bride’s skirt. But it was even worse to see the unsuspecting catcher be forced to put the garter on a woman he’d never met.
People are starting to skip the garter tradition for various reasons. Here are some common hesitations.
They Don’t Enjoy the PDA
Letting your partner under your wedding gown to remove a piece of lingerie — with their teeth or otherwise — is beyond your typical PDA. If you aren’t an instinctively affectionate person or feel uncomfortable kissing in front of people, the idea of having lingerie stripped away in front of everyone might feel more embarrassing than fun.
Single Guests Don’t Want to Get Called Out
Attending a wedding solo can already feel uncomfortable or lonely for some. Single guests might not appreciate being asked to stand in front of everyone just because they’re single, especially after watching your romantic ceremony.
The Concept is Old Fashioned
On the flip side, the idea of identifying the next couple to get married may feel outdated. More and more people are choosing not to get married, making this tradition, as well as the bouquet toss, old fashioned. It can also be exclusionary to LGBTQ guests.
It Can Be Awkward for Guests
Think about who is on your guest list. For many people, doing the garter toss in front of grandparents, coworkers or neices and nephews makes it feel particularly vulgar. Your family members also probably don’t enjoy the idea of taking your garter home as a keepsake. No one wants their sibling’s or cousin’s lingerie.
Reasons to Potentially Keep It
There’s nothing wrong with embracing the wedding garter tradition if it fits your vision. You might be excited to use one that your mom, grandma or aunt made for you. They might use their bridal gowns or other sentimental fabric, adding more meaning than a wedding garter set you could buy online.
Maybe the practice actually fits your personality. If you and your partner like a funny or sexy moment, you might be able to pull it off. Still, consider whether your guests will appreciate it as much as you.
If you like the idea of the garter but not the toss, you can still wear one. Whether it’s your something borrowed or a custom piece that matches your lingerie, you can rock it without taking it off and giving it to someone else.
Alternatives to a Wedding Garter Ceremony
Couples who would rather replace their garter toss with something less anxiety-inducing have plenty of options. See what people are doing with their reception schedules to figure out what you want to do.
1. Play the Shoe Game
The Shoe Game is a fun, wholesome activity you can do during your reception. You and your partner sit back to back and hold one of each of your shoes.
Have your DJ ask questions like, “Who spent the most time planning the wedding?” or “Who’s the better dancer?” You then hold up the shoe of who you think is the answer.
Your guests can laugh along at your answers and learn more about you as a couple.
2. Host a Dance Challenge
You’ll do plenty of slow dancing at your wedding reception, but you can always fit a fun dance challenge where your garter ceremony would’ve been. Hire an instructor to teach everyone a few simple moves so every guest dances at the same time to the same song.
You could also ask people to do quick dance solos and pull a new person onto the dance floor to replace them. As long as everyone’s grooving, the activity will boost everyone’s mood and make your reception feel more lighthearted.
3. Continue Mingling With Guests
There’s no pressure to replace a garter ceremony with anything. You’re creating your wedding from scratch. If you don’t add a garter toss to your reception, there’s no time to fill. You and everyone you love can continue dancing, chatting and enjoying dessert instead. Use the night to do whatever makes you happy, which includes leaving early to catch a flight to your honeymoon.
Make Your Wedding Perfect
When you think about the wedding garter tradition, pay attention to how it makes you feel. Go with your gut. Whether you enjoy the tradition or not, you’ll know you’re planning the ultimate reception when you feel comfortable with your decision.
Wedding Garter FAQs
What Is the Garter Etiquette for Weddings?
Garter etiquette for weddings requires that the bride wear the garter on their thigh and let their partner remove it in front of everyone. However, they can’t reveal anything other than your legs and the garter. The process can be quick, romantic or a hilariously sexual show.
Why Is the Garter Removed With Your Teeth?
There’s no official reason why some people remove their partner’s garter with their teeth. That’s up to every couple. The act can make the removal ceremony more intimate or add a layer of ridiculousness, depending on how your partner removes the elastic fabric.
What Is the Purpose of a Garter Under a Wedding Dress?
In the past, garters were used to hold up stockings. However, they are not commonly worn like that anymore.
Now, people may choose to wear one just for the sake of tradition. Even if you don’t do a garter toss, you may wear one for sentimental reasons, or for a sexy addition to your wedding lingerie.
Originally Published 11/2/2025 – Updated 6/17/2026
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